


Help Me Find My Way on Home

by oppressa



Series: Kurt and Raven, Raven and Kurt (After Berlin) [1]
Category: X-Men (Movieverse), X-Men Apocalypse - Fandom
Genre: Canon - Movie, Gen, Inspired by Music, Internal Conflict, Mother-Son Relationship, Well who knows actually, it was heavily implied right
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-29
Updated: 2016-05-29
Packaged: 2018-07-10 22:09:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 441
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7010188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oppressa/pseuds/oppressa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The boy wants to follow her. Raven has other plans, but they don't last long.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Help Me Find My Way on Home

She can't quite meet his naturally-pleading eyes as she tugs the jacket tighter around his shoulders. More than ever, she feels like she's hiding. She doesn't know whether to be gentler, or firmer with him. He's still frightened, but he's more in awe of her. She can see he trusts her completely. The hero-worship burns even worse than usual; he wouldn't if he knew. _Her baby_. She banishes that thought as soon as it had come.

It seems he huddles closer to her with every jump. _Relax, Raven, he doesn't even know_. But does he suspect? Has he seen her real face on TV, in whatever newspapers he could get his furry hands on, and wondered if she was, if she could be –

Wo gehen wir hin, Mutter? He says. No. He didn't call her mother. He didn't. They have materialised nearer again, and by this time he's speaking directly into her ear.

Somewhere you'll be safe. She lies, meaning _safer than you were in that cage_ , and _somewhere I can get rid of you_.

Why can't I come with you? He asks, as they enter Caliban's lair. Shy but persistent. She doesn't see much of his father in him, apart from the tail, though he's not as graceful with it as Azazel was. That one had used to wrap around her, and stroke her body, as it might have done the night they made Kurt. She tells herself she doesn't remember. Azazel is dead and gone, like so many others she once loved. 

I work alone, she replies, disgusted with herself for even entertaining for a second the idea of taking him with her. For thinking it would make her so happy, at last. It's really better for both of them if he finds a new life, she doesn't care if she has to pay Caliban double the usual rate.

It turns out it won't be the last she sees of him, that he can help her and Raven's too jaded now not to take advantage of that. My name – he starts, and she pretends not to listen, pretends the thought of him hasn't haunted her for all these years she tried to deny his existence. She supposes it won't hurt to keep him with her for a little longer. Whatever happens, he won't be exploited for his powers after that, she won't allow it. Kurt is hers, maybe the only thing she has left in the world. Caliban says she doesn't have friends any more. But she does have this lanky, compassionate boy, who would do anything for her, all of a sudden. She does have her long-lost son.

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from Neil Young's song After Berlin. I wasn't gonna write anything for this movie and then I remembered the end of the 1982 Trans concert (not that I was there) and ahh, it happened.
> 
> I'm not too sure if I got the German for "where are we going" right, so if anybody who is from Germany or speaks it better than me wants to correct, please do. Eta: thanks FullMoonPhoenixShadow!


End file.
